• Szuka, szuka, szuka*...

I miss my bitch. That's right!...

I think I no more miss the one who happen to be my last bitch. No. What I miss is to have around the house a bitch of my own. My own personal bitch.

My last bitch was the best and the worst bitch there is or that could have been to me. The worst because she was, in the end, a real bitch. By the way she handled my broken heart. The best because she got me used to have my bitch. I'm greatly dependent on the concept of having my bitch by my side. Until the end of times.

But I must clarify what I mean to miss my bitch…

To me, to miss my bitch means to miss being desired by someone else. To miss having someone who wants my body and soul and my tenderness. Someone who wants me to be her bitch, as well.

I don't mean I want to have sex all the time. No. I mean I'm more like addicted to cuddling. And I like to shout the sweet name of the person I love. And have that person willing to jump on my arms that very minute. This has happened to be so much often in the past not to cease to wish it. Always and forever! Without getting tired of it a single day.

That's what bitches are for. To make us dependent on their dazzling spell. And in that sweet process, stupidly happy.

The thing is… I have a great deal of wonderful friends. Of those who really care. Of those who are truly of the loving kind. But I'm unable to see on any of them my brand new bitch. It would take someone even more crazy than me.

I have chosen to live my life in an almost absolute freedom from possession of material beings. And there's no one I know who could follow me, with all the consequences that this way of living brings.

So, I probably must stop to miss having a bitch of my own. I must get used to the idea of becoming a hermit. Sadly? Perhaps…

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* Bitch, in hungarian.